The World Needs Better Coaches

June 16, 2019                            NOTES NOT EDITED

The World Needs Better Coaches

Deuteronomy 6:1-10

SIS:      As men, we need to become Godly leaders in our homes, our churches, and our world taking great care to pass on godly devotion and skills to the next generation.

NOTE:  This message still applies to you even if you do not have children of your own or if your children are grown. Or, if you are a single Mom

My kids always get me a gift for Father’s Day, or even several.  Last year, I told them, “Buy me a gift that everyone in the family can get something out of it.”  They bought me a new wallet!

The Bible tells us that we must “honor our fathers and mothers.”  (Deu. 5:16).  That means we love them, respect them, and even care for them as the need arises.  I remember a LITTLE BOY named Michael.  He was about six years old, but even at that young age he felt he needed to love and care for his father.  They were eating dinner one night and Michael said, “Daddy, is it OK to eat bugs?”  Dad replied, “Michael, that is not appropriate talk for the dinner table.”  Michael simply nodded and said, “OK Daddy.”  After dinner the family was sitting in the living room watching T.V.  The Dad said, “Now, Michael, what did you want to ask me about at the dinner table.”  Michael nodded again and said with childish purity, “Oh, never mind Dad.  There WAS a bug in your soup, but it is gone now!”

Maybe father’s ought to listen a little more closely to our children.

The key to America’s future is the traditional family, and the key to the traditional family is — DAD!

The Bible shows us how men can be better coaches:

(Deu 6:1-9)  These are the commands, decrees and laws the LORD your God directed me to teach you to observe in the land that you are crossing the Jordan to possess, {2} so that you, your children and their children after them may fear the LORD your God as long as you live by keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life. {3} Hear, O Israel, and be careful to obey so that it may go well with you and that you may increase greatly in a land flowing with milk and honey, just as the LORD, the God of your fathers, promised you. {4} HEAR, O ISRAEL: THE LORD OUR GOD, THE LORD IS ONE. {5} Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. {6} These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. {7} Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. {8} Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. {9} Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

This is the most sacred portion of Scripture to the Jews–especially, verse 4.  Jesus quoted it as the “Greatest Commandment” (Mk. 12:28-30). It is called the Shema[h], derived from the first word of verse 4, “shema,” meaning to “hear.”  Oh, how we need to hear the message of this text.  Our very survival depends upon it.

The implications of our text our clear. Israel’s future depended upon their understanding and application of God’s Word.  As the nation stands on the edge of the Promised Land, Moses reminds them that success or failure depended upon their obedience to the “words of God’s Law.”  The key to the success of any family or nation is to discover and obey the truths of God’s Word.  In fact, that is the “Hebrew title” of this book of the Bible, “These are the words.”

Americas future depends on Christ-centered,  Biblically-based, families living, loving, and serving together through God’s church.  It is clear that the focus must be the family.  Not the church, not the government–but the family. 

The Jews took this passage very seriously, and quite literally.  Orthodox Jews, even today, will wear phylacteries.  Phylacteries are small boxes that hold the Shema, and a few other verses.  They literally tie them on their hands and feet.  It is not uncommon to find Scripture verses on the doorposts of a Jewish home (called a “mezuzah, (doorpost)”.  The Scriptures are a central fixture in an Orthodox Jewish home.  The home was the center of religious training in Israel, not the Temple.

Over and over again, I have heard fathers say: “Well, I raised them in church.” God never asked us to “raise our kids in church, but to raise our kids at home!”  America needs better coaches in the home, not more spectators in the Church.

The Bible clearly shows us in this text what the key to a successful family is—an obedient father providing for the physical, emotional, and spiritual needs of his family.

1.  First, A great father gives his family DIRECTION (v 1)

(Deu 6:1)  These are the commands, decrees and laws the LORD your God directed me to teach you to observe in the land that you are crossing the Jordan to possess,

This was a new day in the life of Israel. God knew they needed “direction” as they passed into a new phase.  They had never been this way before.  They needed a “guide.”

Fathers, your children need your direction if they are going to “cross over into an unknown land of adulthood.” Our children have never been adults, and they need Dad to point the way. Before you can provide direction for the family, you have to discover the way yourself.  Dads, you must first be living according to verse 5, yourself:

(Deu 6:5)  Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.

There is little chance your family will ever discover the abundant living of the Promised Land, unless parents give their families direction, by providing them an example—a leader—to follow. Love for God is more easily caught, than taught!  Families need direction, but they also need consistent, godly

2.  INSTRUCTION (6:6-7)

(Deu 6:6-7)  These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. {7} Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

Children need boundaries.  Children especially need “religious boundaries.”  I’ve heard parents say, “I’m not going to force religion on my children.  I’m going to wait until they are old enough to decide for themselves.”

This is absolutely nonsense. Do you say, “I’m not going keep them playing in the street.”  I’m going to let them decide when they are older if playing in traffic is something they want to do.”  Our children will be physically, emotionally, and spiritually endangered if we do not give them the instruction they need in life.  A child’s success as an adult is greatly affected by the instruction he or she receives when they are young.

(Prov 22:6)  Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

I like what a good friend shared with me once. “If we do not NIP the twigs of  sin in the bud when our children are young, we’ll have to use a chain saw to clear the brush when they are older!”

Don’t wait until you need a chain-saw to clear the rubbage from your child’s life, Begin their instruction early. Children need to begin to learn the Scriptures from the time they are in the cradle.  Immerse your home in Christian teaching.

3.  Children need PROTECTION (7:1-6)

"I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father's protection."--Sigmund Freud.  I’m not big fan of Sigmund Freud, but even a broken clock gives the right time twice a day.

We need to read ahead to see another need a child has that a Father can meet.  They need protection.

(Deu 7:1-6)  When the LORD your God brings you into the land you are entering to possess and drives out before you many nations--the Hittites, Girgashites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites, seven nations larger and stronger than you-- {2} and when the LORD your God has delivered them over to you and you have defeated them, then you must destroy them totally. Make no treaty with them, and show them no mercy. {3} Do not intermarry with them. Do not give your daughters to their sons or take their daughters for your sons, {4} for they will turn your sons away from following me to serve other gods, and the Lord's anger will burn against you and will quickly destroy you.

Sin brings destruction. The world is hostile to a child’s spiritual development.  Evil is “stronger” than a child’s will-power, and must be “totally destroyed,” or it will end in a child’s “destruction.” A child has the right to expect certain things from the father: food, clothing, and shelter are the “big three.” But, they need much more than physical shelter.  They need “spiritual shelter.”

The world is not a safe place for kids.  They need protection--not just protection from the cold of the world, but from a world that can harsh, bitter, and frightening spiritually.  A world that will devour your children if you do not protect them from its hazards.

Young children, like baby birds, need your protection from the hazards of life.  Children need direction, instruction, protection and they also need

           

4. CORRECTION

Kids will be kids–you can count on it! You can direct your kids, instruct your kids, and protect your kids, but sooner or later you must correct your kids!  The Bible is very clear:

“If we spare the rod, we spoil the child” (Prov. 13:24) Proverbs talks about this in several places.

PLEASE DO NOT HEAR WHAT I AM NOT SAYING . . . These verses are not a license to “beat the daylights out of your children.”Correction must NEVER—THAT IS NEVER–be associated with anger.

A firm hand and a hard heart make a terrible and volatile combination.  Be firm, but gentle. Make sure you send the right message when you correct your children.  I read recently about A LITTLE BOY in the second grade who was complaining to a classmate.  Billy confided in his friend, “Tommy, I’m going crazy at home!  If I make noise, they spank me, and if I’m quiet, they take my temperature!” Children need correction—but make sure you send

the right message. Correction is about LOVE!

That leads right into my final admonition to fathers. I’ve saved the best for last. No coach ever attains greatness without a passion for his players. A great DAD must give his kids direction, instruction, protection, and correction, But, above all, great Dad’s give their wife and kids

5.  AFFECTION (1Cor 13:8)

“Love NEVER fails.”

What is the number one complaint when I talk to wives about their husbands, or children about their fathers in a counseling session?  It is probably not what you think.  The number one complaint ISN’T that “dad is too hard on us!”  Children of even the most domineering father can accept his rules and regulations.  The number one problem ISN’T that “dad is selfish.”  Most children I’ve talked to have as much as they want or have learned to live with what they have.  The number one problem ISN’T “dad does not love me.”  Most wives I’ve met and children I’ve talked to say, “I know Dad loves me.”  The number one complaint about husbands and fathers–men–, is, “Dad does not express his love.” Dad doesn’t say, “I love you.”

Many children grow up and leave the nest without ever hearing their father say, “I love you!”  Wives and children need to hear those words, backed up by a man’s actions—“I love you!”  Dad, your home needs your affection.  You may fail at many things, but if you do not fail at giving your family your affection—you will coach a winning team.  Above all—your family needs your affection.  They need to “see it,” but they also need to “hear it.”

There is no game more important than the “game of life.”  There’s not “next season” in the game of life.  It is one giant “Super Bowl.”  To have success in any game, teams need good coaches.

A few years ago TWO RIVAL HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL teams were locked in combat in the final champion-ship game.  Each team’s reputation was on the line.  The home team was backed up to its own 3 yard lines with time running out.   The score was tied.  On the next play, the first string quarterback was sacked at the line of scrimmage.  Worse yet, his ankle was sprained.  The second string quarterback was out with the flu.  The coach had no choice but to play a freshman quarterback who had never been in a high school game.  The coach hoped that he could keep the game tied, and the first string quarterback could go back in the game during overtime, and save the home team’s reputation. 

He sent the rookie into the game with explicit instructions.  The coach said, “Run 22-e twice, and then punt.”  The coach did not want to take the chance of giving the other team the ball with time left for a possible score.  So, in goes the rookie.  He calls “22-e.”  The team runs the play and to the surprise of everyone they gained 45 yards.  They were now on the 48 yard line.  In the huddle, the rookie quarterback follows his coaches orders and calls 22-e.  This time the team gains 49 yards.  It is last down.  One second remains on the timer.  They are on the 3 yard line.  This would be their last play.  The rookie follows orders.  He takes the snap, drops back, and punts the ball into the end zone.  The game ends in a tie. The team will go on to lose in overtime.

When the rookie comes off the field after punting from the 3 yard line, the coach is red with rage.  The rookie could not understand it.  He followed the coaches orders to the letter.  Barely able to talk the coach stammers, “Son, what in the world was going through your mind on that last play?”  The rookie quarterback answered, “The only thing going through my mind was, ‘man do we ever have a dumb coach!”

America has a coaching problem. We need men who will give their families the direction,  instruction, protection, correction, and affection that they need to be physically, emotionally, and spiritually successful in the game of life. 

I was fortunate to have a great coach for a father, both figuratively AND literally.  For about 11 seasons I played little league baseball in Moundsville, WV.  Little League in Moundsville rivals in excitement anything you would see at the college level.  It was almost a religion.

My Dad was my little league coach.  Dad had been a semi-pro baseball player but gave up his aspirations of playing in the Big Leagues to marry his high school sweetheart -- my mom.  Dad died peacefully in his sleep at the age of 78 in January of 2010.  

I’m not much of a poet, but I wrote a poem many years ago in honor of my Dad and how as my life-time coach he laid the foundation for any success I've had in life.  This poem honors my Dad, and all those dads who have and are "coaching their children to love God and others through service to the Lord Jesus Christ."

Dad was my coach.

He taught me how to face a curve-ball pitcher;

But more than that,

He taught me how to face the curves life throws at you.

Dad was my coach.

He taught me to run the bases with speed and agility.

But more than that,

He taught me how to run the race of life with diligence and integrity.

Dad was my coach. 

He taught me the art of stealing bases,

But more than that,

He taught me that lying, cheating, and stealing were wrong.

Dad was my coach.

He taught me how to catch a fly ball.

But more than that,

He taught me how to catch a vision for what I could become in life.

Dad was my coach,

He taught me the fundamentals of the game.

But more than that,

He taught me the fundamentals of living.

Dad was my coach—But, he was more than that!

Great coaches produce great teams–whether it be baseball, basketball, football, swimming, hockey, or what-ever sport you choose.  Great coaches produce great teams.  But, the greatest coach of all is the father that guides his family to spiritual victory.

Let me end with a Special Note to Fathers:

* I know that there are men here today that would love a chance to go back and change the way you raised your family. I KNOW I WOULD.  You can’t do that. I’m sure you did the best you knew how when raising your kids.

You can still contribute greatly to the youth of our community. by becoming an example to the youth of our church.